Tag: comedic genius

Another week where I barely felt like a human being: exhausted following a weekend shift, then dragging myself through the next six days hankering after the weekend. I won’t lie. I was so cranky by Wednesday that I sent a series of messages to my most kindly disposed colleagues whinging that I had reached breaking point, I was becoming a horrible angry person at work and needed an ado AND THAT ADO HAD TO BE RIGHT THIS SECOND. Of course, that didn’t happen. I could hardly demand an ado of my head of department with little notice, especially when my ethics proposal depended on meeting Prof AZ the following day and then with EEG teaching with said HOD on Friday. Also, why do that to the BPTs who are close to pre-exam meltdown? So instead, I had to go into damage control, which entailed sleeping in a little more Thurs am (5:50 instead of 5:30, which probably made a psychological difference only tbh) and going to yoga on Friday morning to get some zen on (instead of getting up to swim at 5am, which is guaranteed to bring on a wave of exhaustion and crankiness by 10am).

Anyway, I wasn’t remotely grateful last week, but since I am determined to be at least slightly grateful right up until the end of my 20s I shall continue on…

1. I am grateful for any day off. My gratitude increases in proportion to the number of days off, such that I am excited for a regular two day weekend, but stupendously excited for a three or four day weekend; especially when I plan to do plenty of napping on those days off.
2. As a corollary to point 1 – I also love my bed, my warm blankets and my boomerang pillow and I have spontaneously written a haiku about it, so that you’ll all feel the love.

Ode to bed:

Oh beloved bed

Place of dreams, warmth and safety

Where none will page me.

NO JASON WU I DON’T HAVE NARCOLEPSY!

3. I am grateful that I am an anti-shit magnet, even though  shit reflects off me onto someone else… I mean, the only reason that I managed to get my ethics proposal done at all was because I got 1-2 consults and 0-1 admissions a day for the 4 weekdays I was on. While, the BPT was on call for a single day and got 5 consults. I offered to help, but I suspect doctors, or perhaps just physician trainees, are masochists at heart.

4. I am also grateful that I never have to do my first ethics proposal ever again. Breaking one’s ethics proposal virginity has to be one of the most painful life experiences. The online form has 63 pages, plus I had to write a research proposal (noob at that too), a cover letter, a participant information sheet and consent form and collect the signatures of the two supervisors and the HOD. Needless to say, as a noob I did it all wrong the first time. Apparently, there are standard answers to many of the questions like – what if someone was doing illegal things? Apparently the answer isn’t, “but that illegal thing is unlikely to be relevant to me testing their eye movements.” Also, my language was all wrong. Let’s just say, much sleep was lost and many tears were shed but I’ll never go through that again.

5. The Handmaid’s Tale came out on SBS on demand last week! I tried to stream the first episode last night and it didn’t work… but still I am so excited and all of the reviews are so positive. Hope it lives up to the hype. I mean, if it doesn’t I still have the audiobook which is pretty great, but if there are 9 episodes they must have fleshed it out a lot, because the book is pretty short.

6. I stayed up till 1am on Friday evening writing my speech for the Chinese Medical Association on “Women in Medicine”. Gosh that was painful and I definitely needed the three hour nap that stole the rest of my Saturday (but made me feel human again). Yet, I am so glad I did my survey monkey survey and my research for the speech. I feel like I have a better appreciation of how tough it was for women in the past, whilst understanding where we have yet to improve. It’s such a privilege to be in the position I am in now, training in specialty medicine. I also enjoyed the opportunity to stand up on stage and rant on about feminism, with Virginia Woolf quotes, for 15mins <3 <3 <3. I am not sure if I made any impact at all, but I had fun. See my slides here.

7. As a corollary to 6, I really appreciated the article, Picking Up the Pieces, published this week by AMA NSW. I was particularly moved by the final paragraphs where the author essentially writes: women can work together, and if all else fails, we can keep each other company. I really need that warm fuzzy feeling of companionship in the face of the battles we face at work and I’m sure I’m not alone. Moreover, in the course of reading this article, then writing my speech, google informed me that THERE ARE Societies for Medical Women– state and national. Why hadn’t I heard of these before? I am definitely joining. If I’ve managed to learn anything, I’ve definitely learnt the value of collectivization in advocacy (for doctor’s welfare). We couldn’t have achieved so much alone and without the AMA.

8. Despite how hectic last week was, I still managed to go speed dating. I am so glad I went, because I had been feeling suffocated, as though medicine wanted to own my soul (melodramatic as that sounds, they are words I repeat often in the depths of sleep deprived despair). It was great fun! Fifteen minutes is just enough time to chat to a person about their hobbies and their work, without getting awkward. Plus, I am always meeting medical people. Here I met engineers, people in finance, law and IT. Such novelty. Strangely, 90% of the men I met were brown, whilst the women were white (with two Asians). This was a bizarre mix and I do wonder if all events are like this, or if it was just a coincidence. Anyway, within an evening (plus two yoga sessions) I felt more like myself, albeit still sleep deprived.

9. I am totes grateful for the recent run of warm, sunny weather. A total reprieve from seasonal disaffective disorder, however short lived.

10. I am so grateful that the last week is over and that the following promises to be much more manageable (no ethics proposal). Hope this week is a good one guys AND if it isn’t, I recommend whinging a lot (it is therapeutic), good friends, wine, chocolate and catching a wink whenever and wherever you can.

It is a month till I turn 30 so this month I must be very grateful for every last minute of my receding 20s. Also I really believe that finding things to be grateful for everyday will help me to be a super cheerful person, rather like Brooke Socks. So here it goes…

Ten things I am grateful for from the week 15/6-22/6/17:

1. Phone calls to my parents on a Sunday evening… these conversations range from:

• Me watching them watch tv,
• Me watching them talk to each other,
• Me daydreaming whilst my mother asks me questions then gets cranky when I don’t reply
• To my mother telling me the entire plot of Poldark so that I can catch up to the current episode (even though I have told her I won’t be watching the show).

2. Managing to watch Dr Who 2 weeks in a row. Moreover, the past two episodes had the British army and the Roman army respectfully and I do like ridiculous historical dramas and delightful costumes.
3. My friend W gave me a gift. I get very excited about gifts… And with this gift I can pretend to study, whilst really reading a comic with historical figures in neuroscience and a violent octopus.

4. My mother amusing me again… She can’t seem to understand that I shared a link to an article because I thought it would interest her. She was so very baffled. Her response was huh, what? Did you write this? Also, she didn’t understand the concept of a screen shot either. Sorry, Micaela and Le Gai, my mother’s response to this message was pleasant confusion… What who is this that sent me a message? But you just sent it to me? Like what…?

5. Lorde’s new album! Pure Heroine was great, though I was far too old to relate to the teenage shenanigans. I also like Melodrama, despite the fact I have never been a part of the drinking culture and have never been to a house party so cannot relate to lyrics like – “All the time spent off our faces”. I’ve been listening to it all week! Particular highlights:

• The chorus of “Writer in the dark” reminded me of Kate Bush. Mentally pantomiming putting my hands on a glass pane, then flitting about the moors in a red flowing dress whilst singing, “Heathcliff it’s me, Cathy, come home” has gotten me through many a tough moment.
• Also lyrics like, “What the fuck are perfect places” and “Blowing shit up with homemade dynamite” remind me that there are many people in the world who use swear words as their main nouns and adjectives. So I don’t feel quite so bad, since I have basically sworn constantly in my head since 2015, when I started working as a registrar.

6. Also memes related to the latter sentiment, especially sent by friends who relate to the experience… (and memes in general)

7. Transitioning to eMR2 this week. Whilst powerchart went down many times and the new cows are rather large and cumbersome, I am ever so grateful for the progress. It gives me hope that one day we will no longer use pagers and that I will get to participate in the giant pager smash up that will occur when that day comes. Though, a status from the most fabulous Tessa (still fan-gurling) suggests that could be a while…

8. I have a snood with a hood and so my ears are ever so warm…

9. I am also blessed to be an amazing fashionista. As such, I have worn both bobble hair bands on my bun today and in times of strife, I just have to touch my bun for automatic amusement. It also looks great.

10. I am grateful for neurosurgery registrars. Of course they do surgery and they don’t sleep and are ever so stressed, whilst providing a valuable service to the community, saving lives one brain at a time, dealing with dreadful brain tumours etc. However, I am mainly grateful because the current ones are excellent outlets for my desire to troll people constantly. I mean, I was nice enough not to knock when they put a sign on their office door saying “DON’T KNOCK!” Presumably someone was asleep, but as soon as someone puts a sign saying not to do something, I want to do the opposite (I did this many times as a child, as a result suffering many burns from the stove and kettle). But my self control only extends so far.

(I like pretty stationary very much Kikki K. Can I still have my birthday gift please)